a letter to the hateful person

It has been 8 months of me, hating u. for the hurt you have caused me and for the time i've wasted loving you when in fact u lie and betrayed me. the next words and sentence will not be about how i am hurt and how wrong you have been to me.

i'm going to say that, the road u and i go through was full of desperation and sorrow. i was immature and emotional that i don't use rationality when it comes to deal with you. when we started being friends, the first day we smsed each other, u are already telling me your problems. since that day, i've put in my mind that i'm going to help you with your problem. you were depressed and have a lot going on and the only person that u can confide in was me. it felt good being needed. i was really going to be just friends with you. but then, i make a really big mistake by falling in love with you.

at the time, we were always talking and confide with each other about everything and it felt good. that is when my head messed up everything and let the hearts win. i was suppose to be helping you with your deppression. i know i did, but i also put love into it.. which is wrong. i pull back after that. remember? i didn't want to be friends with you anymore because i was in love with you and you were with someone. u know how i felt that time, but u insisted of me staying. i stayed. i let myself loving you when it was very clear your heart was not with me. i wanted to make you happy. i wanted to change you and not be depress anymore.

there were days where i felt so useless and helpless because i was unable to make your deppression go away. if only i know what to say back then with the knowledge now that i have,it would be better for you. so here goes, what you believe is what make you think of yourself. when you said that you are worthless,unloved and with so many bad luck, it is all in your head and a belief that you yourself make so strong that cause you to live a miserable life. a belief that you yourself make become a reality. u can stop it. and only you can change what is in your mind and your belief towards yourself.

i was wrong too for messing up our friendship with my feelings.i should have just walk away. but i didn't and i regret it. i learn from it though. our journey and the pain make me who i am now. i'm grown to become this person who is going to catch her dream no matter what. thank u for believe in me.

i really hope you are well and not depress now. this i said truly from the bottom of my heart.